I remember my friend Lauren once telling me that when she was in pain, she often wished her friends or family could touch the afflicted site and feel for a second what she was going through, so that they could understand. today I wish that more than anything, I wish that i had a family member, or close friend here to give me a big hug, and feel relief at the thought that someone could understand and share how I feel, i think i would sob and sob and sob until I felt empty and satisfied and finally able to sleep. It all comes down to a big squeeze, and I think I really need one.

Tomorrow is the start of an epic couple of weeks of hard graft slogging in the library. my positivity remains within the fact that following that week, my birthday and summer will be here, and I'll have the release I know I need to sort out all my anxiety issues, the shakes, the lack of sleep and concentrate on doing things that I love. Thank God for that.